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 27 Feb 2009 @ 04:15
Social security, the minimum wage, universal healthcare, college for all are ways to guarantee freedom from want. 45 million working people who can't af An economy that drives down wages to increase investor profits creates a cheap labor trapford healthcare cannot all pull themselves up by their bootstraps,
If you work full time, you won't be in poverty. Period. Over 9 in 10 Americans agree that's how it should be.
Did FDR say, oh, it's a time of war, we can't afford to make sure all Americans have their basic needs met?
We can't afford housing, health care, decent jobs. We can't afford all that, it's too expensive, not at this time. The facts of course are, that the New Deal reduced unemployment every year, except when Roosevelt started implementing more conservative policies New Deal financial regulations provided the foundation of a recovery and a stable economic system. And millions upon millions of Americans were helped by New Deal jobs Many economists feel that the problem with the New Deal is that it didn't go far enough, in terms of spending, or else it would have been even more successful in the short term.
The right's anti-New Deal offensive is aimed at besmirching Obama's stimulus plan. FDR's New Deal got us out of the Depression took the unempoyment from 25% to 14% in 4 yrs
As usual, the conservatives have absolutely no conscience about what they did to create this mess. If they did, they'd all be holed up in their gated communities or on their private islands
As for taxes: Obama's already told us, without apologies to anyone, that he plans to raise taxes on people making over $250,000 a year
When you want to stimulate the economy, tax cuts always beat government spending hands-down.
The problem with tax cuts is that people don't spend them in ways that get the economy moving.The Wall Street Journal reports that only 10 to 20 percent of the money remanded to taxpayers in the 2008 tax rebate actually got spent.
The other 80 to 90 percent ended up in people's personal savings, were used to pay off creditors,
So the GOP is out in a fury trying to create their own self fulfilling prophesies insinuating that “the American people have doubts
We understand fully that the Republicans are between a rock and a hard place the stimulus is passed and the economy begins to turn around they will be have a lot of explaining to do next election;
FDR was elected president four times.
What does that tell you?
the American people in the 1930's experiencing first-hand what was going on? Were they not in the best position to tell if FDR's policies were working
Americans were not fooled. They knew F.D.R. was on their side in a way that Herbert Hoover and his fellow free-marketers hadn’t been They could see first-hand the good that Roosevelt’s jobs programs were doing for the Depression’s victims and the slow but unmistakable improvements in the economy.
What was WWII, but a massive government spending program?
T]he New Deal wasn’t as successful in the short run as it was in the long run. And the reason for F.D.R.’s limited short-run success, which almost undid his whole program, was the fact that his economic policies were too cautious
What saved the economy, and the New Deal, was the enormous public works project known as World War II, which finally provided a fiscal stimulus adequate to the economy’s needs. The New Deal also gave the people hope, which was in short supply up until then.
The reason right-wingers hate FDR so much isn't because the New Deal failed, it's because it succeeded, and it's obvious to everyone.
He is not spreading the wealth around. He is talking about giving the middle class an opportunity to get back the tax breaks they used to have.
remember, all Obama's plan does, is restore the tax rates for the wealthiest Americans back to where they were under Bill Clinton, to 39.6% from 35%. Horrors!
Ever since Reagan, the tax burden has shifted to the rest of us. All Obama's plan does is shift some of the burden back where it was, and belongs More >
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 21 Jan 2009 @ 00:21
This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror Where one could read it every day.
, but it's 100% true.
1. There are at least two people in this world That you would die for.
2. At least 15 people in this world
Love you in some way.
3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you Is because they want to be just like you.
4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, Even if they don't like you.
5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you Before they go to sleep.
6. You mean the world to some one.
7. You are special and unique.
8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, Something good comes from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you Take another look.
11. Always remember the compliments you received.
Forget about the rude remarks.
So.........
If you are a loving friend,
Send this to everyone,
Including the one that sent it to you.
If you get it back, then they really do love you.
And always remember....
When life hands you Lemons,
Ask for Sugar and call me over!
Good friends are like stars.
You don't always see them,
But you know they are always there.
'Whenever God Closes One Door He Always Opens Another, Even Though Sometimes It's Hell in the Hallway'
I would rather have one rose and a kind word
From a friend while I'm here
Than a whole truckload when I'm gone. More >
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 3 Sep 2008 @ 14:11
Here are 120 things you can do starting today to help you think faster, improve memory, comprehend information better and unleash your brain’s full potential.
1. Solve puzzles and brainteasers.
2. Cultivate ambidexterity. Use your non-dominant hand to brush your teeth, comb your hair or use the mouse. Write with both hands simultaneously. Switch hands for knife and fork.
3. Embrace ambiguity. Learn to enjoy things like paradoxes and optical illusions.
4. Learn mind mapping.
5. Block one or more senses. Eat blindfolded, wear earplugs, shower with your eyes closed.
6. Develop comparative tasting. Learn to properly taste wine, chocolate, beer, cheese or anything else.
7. Find intersections between seemingly unrelated topics.
8. Learn to use different keyboard layouts. Try Colemak or Dvorak for a full mind twist!
9. Find novel uses for common objects. How many different uses can you find for a nail? 10? 100?
10. Reverse your assumptions.
11. Learn creativity techniques.
12. Go beyond the first, ‘right’ answer.
13. Transpose reality. Ask “What if?” questions.
14. SCAMPER!
15. Turn pictures or the desktop wallpaper upside down.
16. Become a critical thinker. Learn to spot common fallacies.
17. Learn logic. Solve logic puzzles.
18. Get familiar with the scientific method.
19. Draw. Doodle. You don’t need to be an artist.
20. Think positive.
21. Engage in arts — sculpt, paint, play music — or any other artistic endeavor.
22. Learn to juggle.
23. Eat ‘brain foods’.
24. Be slightly hungry.
25. Exercise!
26. Sit up straight.
27. Drink lots of water.
28. Deep-breathe.
29. Laugh!
30. Vary activities. Get a hobby.
31. Sleep well.
32. Power nap.
33. Listen to music.
34. Conquer procrastination.
35. Go technology-less.
36. Look for brain resources in the web.
37. Change clothes. Go barefoot.
38. Master self-talk.
39. Simplify!
40. Play chess or other board games. Play via Internet (particularly interesting is to play an ongoing game by e-mail).
41. Play ‘brain’ games. Sudoku, crossword puzzles or countless others.
42. Be childish!
43. Play video games.
44. Be humorous! Write or create a joke.
45. Create a List of 100.
46. Have an Idea Quota.
47. Capture every idea. Keep an idea bank.
48. Incubate ideas. Let ideas percolate. Return to them at regular intervals.
49. Engage in ‘theme observation’. Try to spot the color red as many times as possible in a day. Find cars of a particular make. Invent a theme and focus on it.
50. Keep a journal.
51. Learn a foreign language.
52. Eat at different restaurants - ethnic restaurants specially.
53. Learn how to program a computer.
54. Spell long words backwards. !gnignellahC
55. Change your environment. Change the placement of objects or furniture — or go somewhere else.
56. Write! Write a story, poetry, start a blog.
57. Learn sign language.
58. Learn a musical instrument.
59. Visit a museum.
60. Study how the brain works.
61. Learn to speed-read.
62. Find out your learning style.
63. Dump the calendar!
64. Try to mentally estimate the passage of time.
65. “Guesstimate”. Are there more leaves in the Amazon rainforest or neuron connections in your brain? (answer).
66. Make friends with math. Fight ‘innumeracy’.
67. Build a Memory Palace.
68. Learn a peg system for memory.
69. Have sex! (sorry, no links for this one! :) )
70. Memorize people’s names.
71. Meditate. Cultivate mindfulness and an empty mind.
72. Watch movies from different genres.
73. Turn off the TV.
74. Improve your concentration.
75. Get in touch with nature.
76. Do mental math.
77. Have a half-speed day.
78. Change the speed of certain activities. Go either super-slow or super-fast deliberately.
79. Do one thing at a time.
80. Be aware of cognitive biases.
81. Put yourself in someone else’s shoes. How would different people think or solve your problems? How would a fool tackle it?
82. Adopt an attitude of contemplation.
83. Take time for solitude and relaxation.
84. Commit yourself to lifelong learning.
85. Travel abroad. Learn about different lifestyles.
86. Adopt a genius. (Leonardo is excellent company!)
87. Have a network of supportive friends.
88. Get competitive.
89. Don’t stick with only like-minded people. Have people around that disagree with you.
90. Brainstorm!
91. Change your perspective. Short/long-term, individual/collective.
92. Go to the root of the problems.
93. Collect quotes.
94. Change the media you’re working on. Use paper instead of the computer; voice recording instead of writing.
95. Read the classics.
96. Develop your reading skill. Reading effectively is a skill. Master it.
97. Summarize books.
98. Develop self-awareness.
99. Say your problems out loud.
100. Describe one experience in painstaking detail.
101. Learn Braille. You can start learning the floor numbers while going up or down the elevator.
102. Buy a piece of art that disturbs you. Stimulate your senses in thought-provoking ways.
103. Try different perfumes and scents.
104. Mix your senses. How much does the color pink weigh? How does lavender scent sound?
105. Debate! Defend an argument. Try taking the opposite side, too.
106. Use time boxing.
107. Allocate time for brain development.
108. Have your own mental sanctuary.
109. Be curious!
110. Challenge yourself.
111. Develop your visualization skills. Use it at least 5 minutes a day.
112. Take notes of your dreams. Keep a notebook by your bedside and record your dreams first thing in the morning or as you wake up from them.
113. Learn to lucid dream.
114. Keep a lexicon of interesting words. Invent your own words.
115. Find metaphors. Connect abstract and specific concepts.
116. Manage stress.
117. Get random input. Write about a random word in a magazine. Read random sites using StumbleUpon or Wikipedia.
118. Take different routes each day. Change the streets you follow to work, jog or go back home.
119. Install a different operating system on your computer.
120. Improve your vocabulary.
121. Deliver more than what’s expected. More >
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 17 Dec 2006 @ 03:29
WASHINGTON - Former Democratic vice presidential nominee John Edwards intends to enter the 2008 race for the White House, two Democratic officials said Saturday.
Edwards, who represented North Carolina in the Senate for six years, plans to make the campaign announcement late this month from the New Orleans neighborhood hit hardest by Hurricane Katrina last year and slow to recover from the storm.
The officials spoke on condition of anonymity because they did not want to pre-empt Edwards’ announcement.
Edwards chose a stark backdrop for a campaign expected to focus on ways to build “One America” and bridge the economic inequality clearly evident in the still devastated Lower Ninth Ward. His campaign is likely to emphasize ways to unite the country and would mark an evolution from his 2004 campaign stump speech that focused on the “Two Americas” of haves and have-nots.
Edwards also plans to travel from New Orleans through the four early presidential nominating states — Iowa, Nevada, New Hampshire and South Carolina — as part of an announcement tour between Christmas and New Year’s Day.
Among Democrats, Sens. Hillary Clinton of New York and Barack Obama of Illinois are drawing the most attention almost two years before the actual vote.
In a good position to run
Edwards, however, is in a strong position as the leading candidate in Iowa. He was a top fundraiser in the race for the nomination in 2004 before he became Democratic Sen. John Kerry’s running mate.
Since the Democrats’ loss to President Bush, Edwards has worked to build support for a repeat presidential bid. He has a retooled agenda that is more openly progressive and has spent time building relationships with labor leaders and traveling overseas to build his foreign policy credentials beyond his one term in the Senate.
Edwards’ spokesman, David Ginsberg, would not confirm or deny that Edwards planned to announce he would run in 2008.
Ginsberg said Edwards would make an announcement about his future when he is ready.
Word leaked about Edwards’ plans just hours after Indiana Sen. Evan Bayh announced he would not seek the presidency in 2008. Bayh had been a leading candidate in early fundraising and, like Edwards, based much of his appeal on his electability. Bayh and Edwards, friends who went running together daily when they were in the Senate, each won election in Republican-leaning states.
Bayh and some other hopefuls have struggled to build their name recognition against the drawing power of Clinton and Obama. Edwards, however, does not have that problem.
Well-known from 2004
He is well known from the 2004 campaign and his profile has risen this year as he and his wife, Elizabeth, went on nationwide tours to promote their books.
A poll of Iowa Democrats that was published Thursday in the Des Moines Register showed Edwards with 36 percent support, more than Clinton’s 16 percent and Obama’s 13 percent combined.
Edwards’ campaign plans include an aggressive fundraising effort to prove that he belongs in the top tier of contenders. Because he currently does not hold federal office, Edwards does not have a war chest like some of his rivals. In fact, he has several hundred thousands of dollars of debt from his 2004 presidential campaign.
link More >
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 7 Jan 2006 @ 23:42
www.lollie.com
Move. Get up and physically move. Start by shaking your body to shake off the pain the way an Olympic swimmer shakes out their muscles before the big swim.. Then walk, jog, run, swim, dance, clean house, bicycle, play fetch with the dog or frisbee with the kids, but get up off of your butt and move. Your brain believes your body before it believes anything else. So operate your body to operate your brain. Shake a leg!
Fun. Have fun! You'll find it extremely hard to stay depressed if you're fast dancing, riding a roller coaster, covered in collie puppies, listening to your favorite comedian or your most entertaining and outrageous friend. Choose to have fun to take a break from emotional pain.
If you're in a lot of pain you'll say,
"but I hurt too much to have fun."
That's not true.
Feel like you hurt to much to have fun? Cover up with those puppies and I dare you to be depressed! You feel like you can't have fun till you're over the hurt but in fact you can make yourself go have fun and that will reduce the pain. You just have to do it. And if you're hurting over somebody, if this is heartache we're looking at, remember, you're about a hundred times more attractive when you're having fun than when you're putting off fun till that person is with you again. Most of us are terrible at pretending. You can't pretend you've been having fun to make yourself more attractive. Having fun changes the way you walk, talk - everything about you. So get up and go have a blast!
Refocus. You must focus on yourself in order to experience emotional pain. Use your head. Focus on someone else's problem's who's got it worse off than you. It is impossible to focus in opposite directions at the same time. Take a break from your own pain by helping someone who has problems. Nothing heals the human spirit more than giving. Nothing heals the heart more than helping others.
see this hot website More >
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 2 Sep 2005 @ 17:31
Sujok treatment harmonises energy on the physical, emotional and even on the chakra plane. Its greatest asset is its simplicity and ease of application, discovers Dr Santosh Patil
Dental acupuncture is a form of holistic destistry aimed at providing new alternative solutions to old existing problems.
Acupuncture could be used in dentistry as a complimentary system alongside conventional treatments. A holistic dentist has an inter-disciplinary approach to health care that facilitates an individual’s innate ability to heal himself.
Its origins
Su in Korean means hand and Jok means foot. Introduced by Prof Park Jae Woo in the year 1987, Sujok is a drugless and natural form of healing. It is a simple yet powerful healing system.
Professor Park Jae Woo a South Korean scientist concluded after many years of research that Su (hand) and Jok (feet) have corresponding similarities to the human body. He has outlined his research work as a total synthesis of body, mind and spirit bringing into perspective the miniature and most powerful correspondence acupuncture system existing today.
Sujok is a pluralistic system of treatment that has two dimensions, the physical and the metaphysical. It is aimed at harmonising the imbalanced energy in the body, tissues, cells and organs.
How Sujok works .
*The thumb represents the head and the neck.
*The big toe represents the head and the neck.
*The index and little finger represent the two hands. nThe second toe and little toe represent two hands.
*The middle and ring finger represent the two legs. nThe third and the fourth toe represent two legs.
*The bulged portion of palm represents the chest. nThe sole represents the chest and the abdomen.
*The other part of the palm represents the abdomen.
*Body’s resemblance to hand and feet.
The body has five projections, so do the hand and foot. Arms and legs have three joints, so do fingers. Thumb has two joints, so does the head and neck
The arms and legs fold in only one direction and so do the fingers. Head rotates so does the thumb. Legs are placed lowest —then are the arms, so do the fingers accordingly. Head is placed the highest, so is the thumb.
Principle behind
Sujok therapy
Sujok believes that there is a continuous flow of energy in all living beings. This energy flows in a very systematic, uniform and methodical manner. In Sujok, all points are simplified and are located in the hands and feet. Advanced Sujok therapy uses needles to balance the energy by methods/theory known as the Six Ki treatment and Tri-origin acupuncture treatment. This treatment harmonises energy on the physical, emotional and even on the chakra plane
Results in direct stimulation of the PNS via the A delta fibers which then feeds into the ascending sensory nerve pathways of CNS. Acupuncture stimulus also shuts Gates within the Substantial Gelatinosa of the spinal cord to produce pain control.
In the head and neck, most acupuncture points lie at the borders of muscles. Chronic muscle damage is often seen at sights known as trigger points, roughly 75 per cent of acu points coincide with trigger points. Trigger points are the source of referred pain and acupuncture in these points will give relief.
Research supports all above mentioned mechanisms. In fact there are multiple modes of action as acupuncture works for a variety of non painful conditions like Asthma, numbness, paralysis and nausea.
Acupuncture points and meridians have correlation with the nervous system, the dermatome organisation and particularly the muscular structures. Treatment usually 15 - 40 sittings done with appropriate spacing is sufficient to cure most diseases.
Any side effects?
Sujok acupuncture is 100 percent safe with absolutely no side effects. Treatment should however be administered with due precautions including cleanliness and elimination of contamination prior to treatment.
Acupuncture relies on the use of color micro-needles, Byol magnets, micro stimulators, heat, pressure and laser light at specific points that effect the flow of vital energy. Acupuncture has a high success rate, with as many as 80 percent of patients responding, showing symptomatic relief in the short to medium term.
Acupuncture is a simple and quick technique, with no complications if practiced correctly.
Many patients accept acupuncture, with scepticism, or trepidation, but are often delighted with the results.
Short training course can allow the technique to be an effective tool in every dentist’s hands.
see
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 12 Aug 2005 @ 16:22
By Nancy Norkiewicz/Get the Beat, The Star
With the warm weather months winding to a close, most people will begin to make their way back to school or work following summer vacation. The beginning of a new school year is generally marked with great enthusiasm and optimism for success. But what if I said that you or your child might perform better in school or at work if you engaged in a bit more physical activity?
What if I told you that exercise can work to increase energy levels, overall feelings of wellness and even help people deal with and heal after a crisis? Read on to learn some of the startling new discoveries that scientists have made about the positive effects of exercise, not just in terms of physical health and athletic skill, but for enhanced mental health and performance too.
By now it's common knowledge that physically active individuals reap many positive physical rewards and benefits. Some of the most obvious training effects include greater efficiency of the heart, lung, circulatory and musculoskeletal systems. It can also help reduce bone-mineral loss associated with inactivity and aging, improve digestion and reduce the risk for developing or incurring any number of injuries. We have also known for years that exercise can be particularly helpful if you need to clear your mind or blow off steam after a stressful day. This is where we begin to cross over into some of the positive mental aspects that are generated by exercise.
Researchers are just now beginning to uncover how even moderate exercise can work to stimulate the brain. In one study conducted at Duke University, half of a group of sedentary individuals ranging in age from 20 to 60 years old were put on a three day a week walk/jog program. After just 10 weeks, the active group reported having greater vigor and mental alertness than the inactive half.
Another study looked at the arteries of nearly 5,000 individuals in the Netherlands (ages 55 to 94) where it was discovered that plaque build up might be more of the demon behind mental decline than simple aging. The tests, both physical and mental, clearly concluded that those with greater arterial disease had poorer mental performance than those with clearer, healthier arteries.
Still, another study showed a direct correlation between cardiovascular exercise and academic success. In this particular study, children were led through 10 minutes of aerobic, rhythmic activity prior to participating in an academic activity like math or reading. Amazingly, students who did the exercise session before a standardized test did 25 percent better on the exam than those who had prepared with 20 minutes of tutoring. That's huge!
As a fitness professional, I am fortunate to witness the positive effects of exercise nearly everyday. Someone may start a class or workout session feeling completely frazzled, depressed, angry or defeated. But by the end, they seem to have worked things out in their mind at the same time they were working out their body. While they may not always come up with a solution to the problem, they usually end up feeling at least a bit more in control of the situation after a good workout.
In the past, physicians and scientists have treated the mind and the body as two separate and different entities. These days, neurologists and psychologists are beginning to see things differently. The brain, although more intricate than the rest of the body, is just another organ. The mind and all other body parts share the same nervous, circulatory, immune and endocrine systems. The well-being of one part of the body is closely intertwined with that of the other parts. If you suffer a brain disorder, it has the potential to send out signals that disturb the rest of the body. What happens in your other organs can most certainly affect brain health, including mood and feelings of self-worth. Have you ever heard someone repeatedly say something like, "my boss is such a pain in the neck" or "this job makes me sick"? Interestingly enough these individuals very often end up with an illness or health condition that manifests itself in the neck area or as some sickness. It appears then that all of our body parts are real, living, breathing organs that have the potential to think and pick up on our overall emotions and feelings. Which is why when we do things that make us release stress and feel good, (such as physical movement or following our life passions), we set off an entire system of endorphins and positive emotions that can help us wade through some of the mental anxiety and stress we experience in life in a more healthy way. Likewise, doing things that aren't representative of whom we really are or that make us feel bad can result in poor health conditions such as ulcers, migraine headaches, or even worse.
While this may sound like new scientific theory, it's interesting to note that Yogi's have known these concepts for over 5,000 years. I have a yoga teacher and he is always encouraging his students to "get on your mat and move" when something is unsettled in your mind. The health on the inside is reflected on the outside and vice versa. Sound mind — sound body.
This is not to insinuate that exercise can take the place of a therapist or other medical doctor. But it can certainly help to strengthen the physical body and although indirectly, the mind. How many times have you witnessed a person who starts exercising and their entire outlook on the world changes? I can honestly say that I see it nearly every day. People who at one time were out of shape or overweight or unskilled and their newfound fitness creates a confidence and an overall zest for life that wasn't there before.
So teachers and employers I'm throwing out an idea to you, albeit a crazy one. If you want to get better productivity out of your students and employees then give them an occasional movement break. You might be surprised at how much good a little physical activity can do. And if your boss or teacher won't act on this advice then do it yourself. If your job is sedentary, then make the effort to get moving before or after work, or on your lunch. Parents, encourage your children to be more physically active after school, or better yet, do it with them. You'll be amazed at the difference a bit of movement can make. If nothing else, the physical activity and emotional release can help you better prepare it for those unexpected speed bumps we sometime experience on this turbulent road we call life. More >
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 10 Aug 2005 @ 10:27
Ten Ways You Can Become More Valuable to Everyone you Encounter
North Wales, PA 19454 August 9 2005
Ten Ways You Can Become More Valuable to Everyone you Encounter
by Terri Levine, Master Certified Coach
Be the change you want to see occur in the world around you. We can't make other people be more considerate, helpful, honest, etc., but if everyone were to work on him or herself and develop these attributes, our world would be a better place.
Don't be judgmental. Look for and recognize the good in yourself and in others. We are all capable of so-called "good" and "bad" behaviors and we all have our "good" and "off" days. We are all unique and it is wonderful that we are different and not all the same - in our appearance, our thoughts, our opinions, our likes and dislikes. Being different is not threatening, it is not "bad", it is just "different". Embrace the differences and be happy for the variety. Likewise, forget the concepts of "right" and "wrong". People are not good or bad or right or wrong; they just are. If you were in "their shoes" maybe you would act differently, or maybe not. Being judgmental wastes time and cuts you off from opportunities and meaningful relationships - because you are not perfect either, and your judgment might be worse than the person's you are judging!
Respect. Don't make the mistake of thinking your rights are the only ones that count. Don't ignore the other person's rights. Our fundamental right is to be respected. Being wealthy does not make a person more deserving of respect and neither does a high-flying career with a fancy title. Respect is not about material issues or where one sits on the social ladder. Respect is acknowledging another human being's dignity and treating them how you wish to be treated yourself. We all came on to this earth equal and we're all checking out as equals. What happens in between is just a series of different life experiences. The poor man who lives in a slum, who cares for strangers, volunteers assistance without expecting anything in return and lives a clean, honest life is more deserving of respect than a wealthy businessman who dresses in fine clothes, lives in a huge mansion, and treats everyone like pond amoeba, cheats on his wife, swindles his shareholders and has forgotten how to tell the truth.
Be a Good Listener. How often do you really listen to other people? How often do you plan what you are going to say next while they are talking, or allow your mind to drift off onto something else instead of concentrating on their every word? It takes practice to be a good listener, but in being one, you are showing respect and in a position to better comprehend the real message being given to you. You avoid misunderstandings and missed instructions. Furthermore, the other person will appreciate your attention and return the courtesy.
Be interested - not interesting. This goes hand in hand with being a good listener. People love to talk about themselves and will delight in the opportunity to do so, so ensure you ask questions and take an interest in what they are telling you. Don't worry about them hogging the limelight - you can have your turn during the conversation. Have you ever met someone who only talks about themselves? Count the number of times you use "I" in your conversations. Judging, arguing points, interrupting the conversation, and using "I" a lot are sure signs you need to review your communication skills.
Respond from Your Heart. We tend to respond to others using our head, not our heart. We formulate stories about us, we defend our ego, or we judge other people or what they have said. If we respond from our heart, we can respond with understanding and a sense of connection. Find something good to say about people and to people. Build people "up" - don't knock them down. Go with your gut instincts.
Be truthful. There is a good reason for the saying "honesty is the best policy". Nothing good ever comes from lies, and there is a difference between being diplomatic and telling an outright lie. Nobody trusts a liar. If you've made a mistake, well, welcome to the human race! You don't have to lie to cover it up. You don't have to tell your truth "brutally", there are gentle and tactful ways of delivering truths and you should think carefully before you speak. But don't try to be deceitful because it has a habit of coming back to haunt you, and in those situations you are worse off
than if you had just come clean in the first place, as uncomfortable as that may seem at the time.
Be helpful. When you need a helping hand, don't you just love the person who comes up and offers that to you? Wouldn't you love the opportunity to repay them? You can be that person that others look to respectfully with gratitude in their hearts, who will, one day, repay the gesture. What comes around, goes around. If you want people to be helpful to you, you must be helpful to others. It doesn't matter whether this is assisting your Boss with a special project you can see he needs help with, or a co-worker who is struggling with a large workload, or an elderly neighbor struggling up the stairs with her arms full. People do remember kindnesses.
Maintain Your Integrity and Your Dignity. People with their integrity intact are easier to deal with in work or personal situations. They know where they stand and you know where you stand with them. You will feel better about yourself when you set your standards and stand by them and you will attract those who respect your standards and who have standards of their own. Being a doormat is disrespectful to yourself and to the person 'walking all over you'. It does not allow them to grow and learn to do something for themselves. Learn to say no gracefully. You have as much right as everyone else on the planet to have your own opinion and your own way of doing things, and reminding you of point (1) above, nobody has the right to make you feel 'bad' if you think, feel or dress differently. Remember, "to thine own self be true".
Go the Extra Mile. I mean this in a couple of ways. First, whether you are either asked to do something, or you are offering to do something, remember that if something is worth doing in the first place, then it is worth doing well. And while you are at it, what little touches can you offer to improve it? For example, who would you rather go to for your shoeshine… Mr. A does a wonderful buff and polish and is timely and not too expensive. Mr. B also does a wonderful buff and polish, he is also timely and not expensive, but he is also cheerful and interested in you and whistles while he works, so after your polish, you go on your way feeling on top of the world! Mr. B just went the extra mile for you. He didn't just polish your shoes, he lifted your spirits and made you feel good. If you are offering a co-worker assistance with copying some documents, go the extra mile and ask if she needs a hand stapling them or collating them. Going the extra mile need not involve a large expense of time, energy or money, but its value to the recipient is often priceless, and one day, it will be reciprocated.
Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say. Neither beat around the bush being evasive, nor make promises you can't keep. On the other hand, if you say you are going to do something, do it. Be known as a reliable person. Honor your promises and agreements wherever possible - this stems back to integrity. Prepare to be flexible if need be, but know that you don't have to bend over so far backwards that your back snaps. Being assertive and being aggressive are two entirely different things, and you do not need aggression to be assertive. In fact, you are better off without the aggression! If you are wishy-washy and allow people or circumstances to be unconcerned for your position, you will develop that reputation and find more and more people willing to walk all over you and more situations in which it occurs. Being like this does not prove you are valuable to anybody - it just means you are a 'pushover'.
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Terri Levine (terri@coachinginstruction.com)
CEO
Comprehensive Coaching U
727 Mallard Place
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Fax : 215-699-3153 More >
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10 May 2005 @ 14:13
.Gay's man's brain works a lot like that of a woman when exposed to a particular stimulus, researchers say.
In an experiment, men and heterosexual women sniffed a chemical from the male hormone testosterone. The homosexual men's brains responded differently from those of heterosexual males, and in a similar way to the women's brains.
``It is one more piece of evidence ... that is showing that sexual orientation is not all learned,'' said Sandra Witelson, an expert on brain anatomy and sexual orientation at the Michael G. DeGroote School of Medicine at McMaster University in Ontario, Canada.
Witelson, who was not part of the research team, said the findings clearly show a biological involvement in sexual orientation.
The study, published in Tuesday's issue of Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, was done by researchers at the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm, Sweden.
They exposed heterosexual men and women and homosexual men to chemicals derived from male and female sex hormones. These chemicals are thought to be pheromones - molecules known to trigger responses such as defense and sex in many animals.
Whether humans respond to pheromones has been debated, although in 2000 American researchers reported finding a gene that they believe directs a human pheromone receptor in the nose.
The brains of different groups responded similarly to ordinary odors such as lavender, but differed in their response to the chemicals thought to be pheromones, lead researcher Ivanka Savic said.
The Swedish researchers divided 36 subjects into three groups - heterosexual men, heterosexual women and homosexual men. They studied the brain response to sniffing the chemicals, using PET scans. All the subjects were healthy, unmedicated, right-handed and HIV-negative.
When they sniffed scents like cedar or lavender, all of the subjects' brains reacted only in the olfactory region that handles smells.
But when confronted by a chemical from testosterone, the male hormone, portions of the brains active in sexual activity were activated in straight women and in gay men, but not in straight men, the researchers found.
The response in gay men and straight women was concentrated in the hypothalamus with a maximum in the preoptic area that is active in hormonal and sensory responses necessary for sexual behavior, the researchers said.
When the female hormone estrogen was used, there was only a response in the olfactory portion of the brains of straight women. Homosexual men had their primary response also in the olfactory area, with a very small reaction in the hypothalamus, while heterosexual men responded strongly in the reproductive region of the brain.
Savic said the group is also doing a study involving homosexual women, but those results are not yet complete.
In a separate study looking at response to body odors, researchers in Philadelphia found sharp differences between gay and straight men and women.
``Our findings support the contention that gender preference has a biological component that is reflected in both the production of different body odors and in the perception of and response to body odors,'' said neuroscientist Charles Wysocki, who led the study.
It's hard to see how a simple choice to be gay or lesbian would influence the production of body odor, he said.
Wysocki's team at the Monell Chemical Senses Center studied the response of 82 heterosexual and homosexual men and heterosexual and homosexual women to the odors of underarm sweat collected from 24 donors of varied gender and sexual orientation.
They found that gay men differed from heterosexual men and women and from lesbian women, both in terms of which body odors gay men preferred and how their own body odors were regarded by the other groups.
Gay men preferred odors from gay men, while odors from gay men were the least preferred by heterosexual men and women and by lesbian women in the study. Their findings, released Monday, are to be published in the journal Psychological Science in September.
The Swedish research was funded by the Swedish Medical Research Council, the Karolinska Institute and the Magnus Bergvall Foundation. Wysocki's research was supported by the Monell Center.
On the Net:
Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences: [link]
Karolinska Institute: [link]
Monell Center: [link]
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