|19 Feb 2006 @ 19:50, by N Marion Hage|
All who breathe are living; but not all the living are alive; at least not in the sense that they are enjoying the breath they were given.
If every parent had wisdom and insight and the character to raise children, they would set them on a course toward success. Success is measured by realizing our purpose, and fulfilling that purpose. If I realized my gift, which many people do not, I would be happier for one; but I'd also know how to structure my life.
Humans have to have dreams or we stagnate; and what I mean by a dream is a sense that there is a destiny and purpose; and if we know it, we can take steps towards that goal.
Every "real" dream is going to face roadblocks. The way to success is not paved with pillows. It's often rocky and there are adversaries; and because of that, if we forget we have a dream or don't know what it is, we will wind up in a life of futility.
Futility is expending a great deal of energy and going nowhere. It is the most frustrating feeling, "My life is meaningless and empty; it's a tedious existance."
So if we know we have a gift and a purpose, and a big dream, we are halfway to where we are going, and way ahead of most of the people in the world.
Since few people have wise, mature, parents, ones filled with character who help their children realize their strengths and that they should reach for the stars, dreams get squelched, and some people don't have a clue that they even have a gift, let alone what that gift is.
And since this is reality, it is one of the great gifts in life to be someone who understands and knows how to kindle life in another. In a sense it is within us to breathe life into others so that their dormant gifts are realized and dreams are birthed.
How? Most screwed up people don't need anyone to tell them they are screwed up. Enough people in this world have said, "What's wrong with you?" In fact, when they screw up, they've probably said, "What's wrong with me?"
And they may put up defenses and pretend things are going well when they aren't, but mostly because they've been beaten down. If someone told me I'd never be good at anything, and everything I do falls apart, I start to expect that things will fall apart, and in effect, walk around sabotaging myself.
In order to breathe life, we have to comprehend that it's necessary, that most people don't like feeling trapped in meaningless existance. But we also have to get a sence of what gifts are.
What are kinds of gifts? Well, some are teachers, by nature. However, there are many spheres where teaching is needed. Others administrators by nature, the kind of people who know how to put people in all the right places, watch over details, and organize. Some people are meant to help identify problems and solve them, and in the sense, they are watchmen over society, to help keep things on course. Still others find their meaning in helping people in a variety of ways, planning and performing all the necessary tasks that every function requires. Some have a gift of hospitality, refreshers of souls who can identify others needs, and know what things will encourage them. There are artistic gifts, gardening gifts, and I mean people who think in creative ways how to make everyone's life better, not simply laborers.
Gifts are expressed in countless ways according to natural interests. One teaches children, another college, and yet another may be a motivational speaker. There is no lack of places teachers are needed. Likewise an administrator can also be a movie producer if he has an artistic bent. So, gifts can be expressed outside the box.
We are not happy if we are not using our gifts. In a sense we are always swimming upstream and never with the currents. Life is tedious and boring and we get frustrated because we may be doing what is counter to our nature.
I may be smart in some ways, but I get flustered if asked to organize anything. Yet there are some who can organize an event blind-folded.
In a sense, each one of us is meant to be part of a bigger whole, a community where no one is expendible. And so we all benefit when people find their place.
Once we are aware that people are gifted, in some cases we end up taking the place of perhaps dysfunctional parents by telling people when we realize they have a gift. Now that gift may not seem important to them, because we tend to dismiss whatever we are good at. And so, there is some selling involed, in the sense of saying, "No, you are not common. If I tried to do what you do, it would be impossible. What you do is an art, a gift, and you simply need to learn how to use that.
Next, think big, and work from there. If I can teach, which I believe I can; I may be content telling a room filled with six people how to tie shoes. But since so many others can do that, I want to dream bigger.
When we sense someone has an amazing gift, we need to tell them, and sometimes birth a dream. "Boy, you are so much more talented than most teachers...you should be speaking in front of audiences..." or "You are always able to identify problems and come up with solutions, you shouldn't be a secretary, you should be an administrator.."
Now this may require a change in our bents because we might be more prone to telling people what is wrong with them rather than what is right with them, and may think by telling someone what is wrong we are doing them a big favor. If someone isn't where they should be, they likely already know it. And it is so much better to kindle a hope than to dash one.
When people are hopeless, and someone births a hope in them, they appreciate it. That person might say something that changes someone's life from an obscure life of frustration to a life of fulfillment.